Blogs :: one year
Today marks exactly that. One year I have been "on the road". Gone from the U.S. of A. Disappeared from first world societies. In all truthiness, I am not really sure where to start writing this blog. For the past two days I've thought about what I would write on this aniversario with nothing really coming to mind then or now. So, let's just write...
Perspective. Changed. How could it not be? Struggles. Every day. Different in many ways than friends and family back in the real world, but the same in other ways, on other days. I am still looking, just like many in life. Looking for what is next. Looking forward to the surprises. Wondering where I am going: physically, mentally, socially, spiritually...
Physically I am on a road, sometimes a dirt one, sometimes a paved one, sometimes just a trail, going somewhere around the world in some odd fashion. The path is literally almost always winding, like I am going around a corner the entire time, never able to see more than 5 feet or 5 days in front of me. True it does straighten out once in a while, or at least it pretends to long enough to feel comfortable again. Rest, rest, rest...
But forgetting that road might drop off at any moment throws the mental state of being all out of whack. When it actually happens. Breaks are rarely applied. You just hold onto whatever shit handle you can find. "It" being the unexpected. When the bombs in the head finish exploding and the storms of the journey settle, I step back and realize, with a grin on my face turning into wholehearted laughter, "This is why I am here."
I've read several blogs from long-term travelers about making new friends and making new ex-friends a few weeks later. It's mostly true. The joy of new friendships cannot be underestimated. But with it always comes the realization this person will most likely not be a significant part of your life in the future. And that, that can be depressing. Its like fishing in a catch and release stream. Sometimes however we break the law. Those are the moments lived for. It's like turning suddenly into a field at ridiculous speeds trying to escape the cops chasing you out of town for causing trouble. Causing trouble is fun, we too often forget that. That excitement. That adrenaline. That story. That is worth losing a few to make one new.
Spiritually, where am I? Some days I am honestly not really sure. I explore ideas, I act on others, I forget even more. Another part of my journey with so many questions yet to be answered. But the core remains, Thank God.
So where does that leave this story? Most obviously...to be continued. And that is something to cheers to: health, success, and another crazy year down roads unknown...
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Posted By:
Brendon
10/1/2009